


Ennoshita Chikara and the Sorting of Fire

by Crollalanza



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: M/M, Shimmer Tsukky, Suga provokes debate even when he's not there, mild relationship mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-17
Updated: 2015-07-17
Packaged: 2018-04-09 19:24:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4361327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Crollalanza/pseuds/Crollalanza
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's supposed to be a production committee meeting in a cafe for Ennoshita's latest movie, 'Shimmer Tsukky' , but he's beginning to wish he'd never started the bloody project. For the one thing Chikara's learnt in life, is that any mention of Harry Potter provokes deep debate about Sorting. He quashes Narita's arguments, ready to resume the meeting, but then their waitress offers her own opinions.</p>
<p>And the argument rages on.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ennoshita Chikara and the Sorting of Fire

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Andramion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andramion/gifts).



> This story happened this morning after a twitter conversation about the Shimmer Tsukky film poster, and the actual fact that AKAASHI KEIJI IS THE CAMERA OPERATOR! I'm gifting this to Nikki because -SHE STARTED IT!
> 
> Sorting is a contentious subject, so I'm not going to tell you where I'd place any of the characters, although they'rein there somewhere.

“Gryffindor?” Narita blinked. “Uh ... why?”

Chikara sighed. He knew this would happen. Discussing Hogwarts Houses with people always led to a debate, usually accompanied by utter disbelief. It wasn’t only with his real life friends where passions ran high, but online too, the arguments would become fierce, spilling into nastiness at times.  He didn’t want that to happen now, so was determined to stand firm, or his artistic integrity would be called into question.

“Are you saying he’s not brave? He took on Ushiwaka.”

“Bravery is NOT the preserve of Gryffindors,” Narita argued, adding hotly, “More Hufflepuffs stayed to fight than Ravenclaws...”

Chikara threw a soggy napkin at him. “Shuddup! We’re not discussing Ravenclaw versus Hufflepuff again, you daft badger.”

Giving him a dark look, Narita fished the napkin out of his coffee, placing it on his saucer. “My point is that you can’t put everyone in Gryffindor on the basis of bravery. There’s a degree of recklessness, too. And idiocy. Look at McLaggen!”

“Yeah, yeah, we’re not talking about McLaggen. OR Romilda Vane, okay?” Chikara was firm. “He’s a Gryffindor in this. And so’s Yamaguchi.”

“Yamaguchi?  Uh ... why? He’s an _obvious_ Hufflepuff!”

“No, I’m thinking in a Neville way. You know, how he wants to be a Hufflepuff, but the Hat saw something in him and placed him in Gryffindor. And, he did face his fears in that second Seijou match. That has to count for something!”

“Are you telling me that Ernie MacMillan wasn’t brave? That Hannah Abbot didn’t face her fears ... or Cedric. Remember Cedric, Chikara,” His voice took on an older tone, one important and reverential. “Remember when the time comes to choose-”

Rolling his eyes, Chikara let out an exaggerated groan. “No! Not the Dumbledore speech!”

“TONKS!” Narita protested. “You’re forgetting Tonks, Chikara!”

“STOP IT!” he yelped. “I am _not_ getting dragged into this again. We can argue all we want, but the fact remains that _this_ is the script and Shimmer Tsukky is a Gryffindor.”

“You’re ridiculous. He’s a Slytherin. And Yachi?”

“She’s not Yachi in this. She’s a representation of Hermione. It’s a parody, and she’s Hitokione Yacchanger.”

Narita snorted, not even bothering to hide his disgust, and Chikara was convinced he was going to argue again, but just then they were joined by the third member of the production committee.

Kamasaki Yasushi had been dragged along with the rest of the Datekou team to watch Aone’s last performance. Initially sceptical, he’d very quickly appreciated both the film and Chikara’s direction, so much so, that a few days later, he’d biked over to Karasuno and hung around to speak to him.

Having left Datekou and started a job, he was bored, he told Chikara, and offered to help in any future projects. Although surprised and a little wary (because Kamasaki was a tall hulk of a man who never stopped flexing his muscles even when not on court), he accepted gratefully then tried to work out what Kamasaki could do.

The thing was, he wasn’t an actor, they didn’t need anyone to operate the camera, Narita was in charge of music, and Chikara would – as usual – write and direct. What he did need was someone who could co-ordinate between people, someone with a degree of organisation who could command respect, or scare everyone into doing their allotted tasks. Giving him the title of Art Director, after assuring Kamasaki he wouldn’t have to actually draw anything, Chikara welcomed him on board.

(And yes, he was still a little wary of the guy, but so were the others and it kept them on their toes.)

“Yo.” Kamasaki pulled up a chair with his foot, slapped his bag on it, then pulled out a large folder before sitting down. “I got through to the suppliers, and they’ll give you a discount on the paint if you mention them in the programme. Also ...” He opened his folder. “I kinda had an idea about the poster.”

Interested, Chikara bent over to look and started to nod. Kamasaki couldn’t draw, but his idea was good, Tsukishima smiling at them – well, smirking, really -  Yachi holding what looked like a sack but he presumed was a cat, and Tadashi between them, his expression of quiet terror obvious.

“They’re _all_ Gryffindors,” Narita remarked. “And who is that in the air?”

“Your oddball duo!” Kamasaki snarled. “I thought they were Quidditch players, or something? And Ennoshita-kun said they were Gryffindors, didn’t ya?”

“Yes, yes they are,” Chikara replied and glared at Narita to shut him up.

“I’m saying nothing,” he muttered. “But ...”

“NO! Stop it now. Look, this is a spoof,” Chikara declared. “I have gone with Gryffindor because that’s the House everyone knows. And we’re not talking about which House any of these people be Sorted into in real life. It’s fiction. That is all!”

A voice shot across the room from the counter. “Hey, Chikara. Keep it down. You ain’t the only customers here, ya know!”

“Sorry.” He gulped, not wanted to receive a lashing from the waitress, who he knew could strip paint with her tongue, and focused his attention back on the poster, wondering where or if he could slot in Shimizu.

But quietening down didn’t save him, and soon the waitress sashayed over. “Okay, who’s for a refill?” Saeko asked. She grinned at Kamasaki who was staring at her with glaringly obvious approval. “What you want, sweetheart?”

“Clea ... uh ... tloffee ... uh .... a glass of water,” he croaked.

“Tap, I bet,” she said, resigned then bending over she whispered. “Look, guys, I don’t mind you sitting here all day, but the manager is running a business and she’ll get antsy if you make your coffee last three hours.”

“Um, I’ll have a cup of cake and a slice of ... I mean, I’ll have another coffee and a slice of cake,” Narita said, his voice slightly less quavery than it usually was when faced with Tanaka’s sister.

“Cool. What about you Chika-chan?” she asked.

“Just tea,” he answered and shot her an apologetic look. “I’ll eat here later, I promise, but I’m waiting for someone.”

She heaved an exaggerated sigh but gave him a wink. It was as she was turning to the counter, that something on the table caught her attention and her eyes widened. “OOOOOH, Harry Potter,” she whispered. “That’s my kinda thing.”

“Really?”

“Hey, don’t look at me like that! I grew up with the books, and I read them all to Ryuu. Gah, huge part of my life.” Her eyes went dreamy, and before Chikara could stop her, she’d flopped into a chair, still reminiscing.

“Ya know something, I still Sort people in my head. Like customers come in, and if they smile a lot, and leave a tip regardless of what they ate, I think ‘Hufflepuff’. Those readin’ books and don’t look up much, I always assume are in Ravenclaws. Groups of them comin’ in always divide the tip between them, like calculatin’ down to the last yen. Slyths leave a large tip, but only if the service and food are good. Otherwise it’s nothin’” She chewed her lip. “Gryffindors are the loud ones who empty their wallets and it’s a tossup whether the tip’s large or small.”

Narita, never one to miss an opportunity to speak to Saeko or needle Chikara, jumped in. “So, where would you place the Karasuno team, Neesan?”

“Huh? Oh ...” She chewed her lip. “I ain’t thought about it much. My bro’s obviously a Gryffindor, and Yuu. Sawamura ... yeah, he’s a Gryff. He kinda reminds me of Oliver Wood. Like he has that total obsession with the game thing going on. Same with Grumpy-kun.”

“Who?” Kamasaki whispered to Chikara.

“She means Kageyama,” he whispered back.

“But Grumpy ain’t really a Gryffindor. He’s more ... uh ... well, I hate to say it now, cause it sounds mean, but he’s kinda Slytherin, doncha think?  All  moody and ambitious and –“

“He’s a team player, though,” Narita put in.

“Hmm, yeah, I guess,” Saeko said, but she was shaking her head. “But was he at eleven? That’s when they’re Sorted.”

“What about Tsukishima?”

“Don’t start,” Chikara warned Narita.

But there was no putting the genie back in the bottle now because Saeko was ticking everyone off on her fingers, giving excellent reasons for each choice, but admitting finally that some of them had her stumped.

“Like, Azumane is kinda scary on court, and brave, but in real life he wouldn’t hurt a fly. I’d have to put him in Hufflepuff, but then again he could have that whole Neville thing going on.”

“Neville, again,” murmured Narita.

“What was that, honey?” she queried.

Narita blushed furiously at being addressed and gulped his coffee, spluttering when it went down the wrong way. And although Chikara had this urge to watch him suffer because he had brought up the Sorting subject _yet again,_ he was interested in Saeko’s reasoning now.

“It’s a bit of a cliché that when we can’t work out where someone should be, we use the Neville excuse. Or the Hermione one. You know how she should have been a Ravenclaw?”

“Ah.” She frowned in concentration. “Then Grumpy-kun could pull the Harry Potter line and choose Gryffindor, rather than Slytherin – that way he could be with Shou-chan. I mean, if anyone’s got a Horcrux in him it’s that kid.”

It was unfortunate Chikara was drinking at the time. On hearing Saeko’s theory, he spat out his tea, splattering both Kamasaki and the poster. “Oh gods, I am so sorry,” he implored, but he still couldn’t stop the laughter even when the rest of the tea dribbled from his nose.

“What house are dumbass clumsy kids in?” barked Kamasaki, making a show of mopping up the tea.

“Ravenclaw!” Narita cried, drowning out Chikara’s cry of ‘Hufflepuff’.

“Nah, they’re the smart ones. Like Yacchan and Tsukishima,” Saeko said, oblivious to the antipathy between the three of them. “And Suga-chan – Ryuu says he’s smart, too, but I’m not sure ...”

Chikara gulped. Saeko had mentioned the ‘S’ word, the one person no one agreed on. His eyes met Narita’s and although he wanted to end the conversation now, there was no way it was going to drop.

“Ravenclaw,” Chikara insisted. “He’s heading to university and is an excellent reader of the game.”

“Slytherin,” Narita countered, locking looks. “You _know_ he is.”

“Sweetie-pie Suga-chan? No way!”

“Owner of the sickest burns on and off court!” Narita told her. “Ambitious, too, and very good at getting you to do what he wants without you even realising.”

“He’s smart. And ambition isn’t – to put it in your words – the preserve of Slytherin. Just look at the Weasley twins,” argued Chikara.

Kamasaki yawned, not even bothering to put his hand over his mouth. He got to his feet and wandered over to the counter to order his water, clearly realising that their waitress was a fixture at the table now.

“He’s loyal, though,” Saeko said. “Ain’t that a Hufflepuff thing?”

“Well, yeah,” Narita replied, and it was odd that now he was engaged he’d lost his nerves with Saeko. “But Slytherins are loyal, too. All the Houses are really, but Hufflepuff’s like the House you go to when you don’t fit the others better.”

“Really?” Saeko twisted to face Chikara. “I always thought they were the hard workers. Am I missin’ something?”

Resigned to losing the point of this meeting, Chikara nodded wearily, agreeing that Suga-san was a hard worker, too. “But then everyone on the team works hard. Even Tsukishima now, so perhaps we’re all Hufflepuffs.”   He paused, wanting to close the subject, but now Saeko and Narita were discussing their favourite characters

(“I had the biggest crush on Oliver – Ooops, don’t tell Sawamura that!”

“I wanted to be a Gryffindor at first, but Hufflepuff’s more me.”

“I cried for days when Cedric died. My poor eleven year old self never recovered.”

“I cried more for Hedwig,” Narita admitted.)

The bell rang over the cafe door, the sound bringing the three of them back to reality, as a figure stood there soaked through to the skin. Akaashi Keiji, their camera operator glowered at them all. He’d been out alone most of the afternoon to capture some background shots, and although Chikara had offered to postpone the meeting and go with him, he’d declined. Keiji preferred working by himself, and Chikara trusted him enough to leave him to his own devices. He’d set out some ideas of what he wanted, and more often than not, Keiji would return and they’d find their ideas had melded into one glorious vision.

 “Keiji, you made it.”

“Yes, walked from the bus stop.”

“You should have called. Mum would have picked you up.”

“Wasn’t raining when I got off,” he muttered, letting Chikara take his camera as he rolled his shoulders. “And my phone died.”

“Take a seat, and ... uh .... Saeko-san, might we have more drinks? And I’ll take a look at the menu now.”

She got to her feet, brushed down her apron, and returned to the counter, brushing past Kamasaki.

“This your cameraman, right?”

Making rapid introductions, Chikara sorted through the papers on the table, showing Keiji the minutes of the meeting so far (Keiji raised one eyebrow at the sheet of blank paper, but didn’t look surprised) and then showed him the poster.

“Mmm, good composition,” he murmured to Kamasaki.

_Don’t ask why they’re Gryffindors,_ Chikara secretly pled with his eyes. Keiji stared at him, his lip twitched a little, but he said nothing until he reached the page with the cast list.

“Your coach is in it this time?”

“Huh... Oh, Ukai-san. No, not ... well ... he was our coach. He’s the previous coach, our current Coach’s granddad.”

“Ah ... is he Dumbledore?”

Narita tried to stifle a chuckle, but even when he pressed his lips together, strange noises emitted from his mouth, and there was a gargle in his throat, threatening to suffocate him. And Chikara knew why, because as soon as he’d devised the script he could see no other person in the role other than their old nemesis. Approaching Ukai Senior had taken guts, the type of courage most people only assumed Gryffindors had, but Chikara had channelled Terry Boot facing the Carrows, and Narita had decided he was as brave as Cedric, and together they’d braved the old man one afternoon the week before.

“Never thought I’d see the pair of you again,” Ukai had greeted them with, scowling. “Not so gutless, huh?”

At that point, they both assumed he’d yell no, but Ukai’d heard them out while they helped him pick fava beans, and over a glass of lemonade, had agreed.

“He’s Filch,” Chikara informed them. “Takeda-sensei is Dumbledore. We’re aging him up, obviously.”

Keiji nodded again, showing neither approval nor disapproval. “Who are these two?” he asked, pointing at the cast list. “I don’t recognise them. Are they from Datekou, too?”

“Who?  Oh, no, they’re friends of Hinata’s. Very keen and Hinata’s a good judge of character, so I think they’ll fit in well.”

“Good.” He was tight lipped, an attitude that Chikara knew put many people off him. It wasn’t deliberate, but Keiji needed a certain amount of distance between himself and other people until he’d been able to form a rounded opinion of them. He knew Narita now, but Kamasaki was an unknown to him.

“Drinks and menus, guys,” Saeko called, swinging across to them. “Hey, Akaashi-kun, how long you here for this time?”

“Just a week,” he murmured.

“Your team don’t miss ya then? I thought they’d begrudge you the time away.”

“Ah, Ukai-san has very kindly said I may train with Karasuno while I’m here.” He gave her a glimmer of a smile. “Bokuto-san assumes I’m on a spying mission.”

“And are ya?”

The smile became wider and there was a glint in his eyes. “Maybe.”

Over drinks and later food, they finished the meeting, Kamasaki leaving early as he had an evening shift. He ruffled Chikara’s hair, clapped Narita on the back, bowed to Saeko and nodded to Keiji before walking out the cafe. It had gone well, after the slow start, with plans in place for locations, and the promise of money from several local stores, but Chikara was tired now and rubbed his eyes wearily.

 “Let’s call it a day,” he said to Narita. “Your plans for music are good. We need to dig out the soundboard and check it’s working properly. Also, Takeda-sensei said he could get you more time in the sound studio, so we have to chase that up. But apart from that, it’s all good.”

After Narita left, Chikara slumped back in his seat, tired beyond all measure. “I wish I hadn’t started on this one.”

“You always say that.”

He opened one eye. Keiji was smiling at him. “I mean it this time. Harry Potter brings out the worst in people.”

“In what way?”

“Narita, right. My best friend. But we always argue over bloody Sorting. It’s ridiculous. I mean, why can’t he just accept that -” he groaned. “Here I go again. Can’t leave it alone.” He straightened up, noting that Keiji was still smiling at him. “I’m _so_ pleased you’re not in the fandom. I think that’s why I like you, Keij.”

Keiji chuckled, the sound both odd and beautiful. “Typical Claw,” he whispered. “Wanting the debate, but hating it if someone bests you in an argument.”

“He did _not_ best me. He just won’t accept that Suga-san is ... Uh ...” He stopped speaking, taking in not just Keiji’s words but the fact he was now rubbing his ankle up and down Chikara’s leg.

“Suga-san is what?” Keiji murmured, blinking slowly as he continued the pressure.

And how could he concentrate when Keiji’s hand was now on his thigh? “A Sly-Huff –Rav -Gr- I have no bloody idea.”

“It’s what you prize isn’t it?” Keiji said, his voice matter of fact, but his eyes intense.  He removed his hand and leant forwards. “Suga-san values his team, works hard, and cares. Sorting is an imperfect science. It’s not even a science, so I don’t know why we get so het up about it, but ...”

“You’re a Potterhead?”

“Aren’t we all?”

“You never said.” Chikara swallowed. He wanted to leave now, get Keiji back to his room, indulge in something other than the bloody film and Harry Potter, but Keiji’s unfinished arguments were sticking in his craw.

“Where would you place him, then?”

Keiji gulped down his coffee and after wiping his mouth on a napkin returned to the conversation. “He stayed on, didn’t he? He’s not a regular, so that tells me he’s very loyal. It’s also not just about wanting to play for himself, but making sure you all play, too. He waits - rather like you do. So ... Hufflepuff for him.”

He let the words sink in, wondering and thinking over his vice-captain and his motives. “And me?” he asked, his voice small. “You think I’m a Hufflepuff, too?”

Shaking his head, Keiji raised his hand, signalling for Saeko and the bill. “I can’t see you staying on, Chikara, not if it means sacrificing your college place,” he said slowly.

Open mouthed, Chikara sought to deny it, but even as he formulated all the arguments in his head, he knew Keiji was right. He’d be Captain of Karasuno, but it wouldn’t be a long spell. He didn’t have the skill of Sawamura, or the devotion of Suga to risk his future.

Under cover of the sheaves of paper littering the table, Keiji’s hand covered his, giving it a small squeeze.

_It’s okay,_ he was saying. _You don’t have to be like them._

“Question?” Keiji asked.

“Uh ... yeah, sure,” he replied, but he wasn’t sure, He didn’t want to think about his future or answer anymore questions about college. Keiji, as usual, had shot his arrow true, and he couldn’t deal with the wound just yet.

But Keiji, it appeared, was taking pity on him and steered the conversation down a different path.

“Why are they all Gryffindors?”

“Huh?”

“Tsukishima, Yamaguchi and Yachi. I understand Kageyama and Hinata, but those three. A Slytherin, a Hufflepuff and a Ravenclaw, if ever I saw them.”

Chikara started to laugh. The wound was just a scratch for now, and as Saeko wandered over with their bill, he confessed.

“I got a deal on the costumes. The trouble is all the ties are red and gold, as are the Quidditch robes.”

“You sly crow! That’s brilliant! You should be a Slytherin!”

“Same House as you?” Chikara queried. “Don’t think so. Besides, as a Ravenclaw, I’d think up the cleverest ways to meet up unobserved.”

“Good point, Chikara,” Keiji replied and licked his lips. “And inter-House, just like inter-Team, sneaking around can only promote harmony.”

**Author's Note:**

> Also, special mention to memorde because the story 'it never rains; but it pours' is hilarious and inspirational.


End file.
